Put the Bunny Back in the Box.

Beauty is a Funny Thing

So I'm listening to Dream Theater's newest album, Black Clouds & Silver Linings while I work at my dad's office, and the most amazing thing happens: I'm overwhelmed with joy. If you know me at all, then you know that Dream Theater is one of my all-time favorite bands, constantly shifting between the 1 and 2 spot. Well, with the ending guitar solo on "The Best of Times" alone, they're back at number 1. I just about broke down in tears it's so beautiful. I don't think a song has done that to me in a long long time, and certainly not a recent Dream Theater song.

I can barely even type this as I listen to it for the tenth time in a row. I don't want it to end.

Sweet Lord, I'm a sucker for epic, sweeping guitar solos, but this one can't even be described. It's as if John Petrucci invaded my dreams and found everything I like about music and said, "Here you are, my son, I wrote this just for you."

This is starting to sound kind of gay now that I think of it, so here's a list of my Top Ten Favorite Dream Theater Songs of all Time.

10) "The Best of Times" - Black Clouds and Silver Linings

This probably sounds hypocritical because of the huge orgasm I just had for this song, but that's mostly just the solo. The rest of the song is only halfway amazing.






9) "Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence" - Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence

This 42 minute song is all about different mental disorders and what the people that have them experience on a daily basis. What I love about this song is that they use several musical themes in each segment that seem to accurately portray a mood, and also, they refer back to these themes in later segment. The solo on the "Goodnight Kiss" segment is especially heart-wrenching, but the best part has to be the Finale, when the band bursts into a triumphantly hopeful chorus, kind of as if to say, "This stuff sucks, but it's all gonna be OK."


8) "Sacrificed Sons" - Octavarium

Full Orchestra - 'Nuff said.










7) "Octavarium" - Octavarium

This song is fantastic. Dream Theater puts everything they're fans love about them into this song, then they add a flute solo. Wow! Parts of this song sound like they could be the soundtrack to a spaghetti western, other parts sound like video game, others are almost fully orchestral. Also, for the second time in his career, James LaBrie hits the high F#5. Wow! Again!



6) "Voices" - Awake

John Myung does some really cool shit with the bass guitar on this song, Petrucci busts out a face-melting solo near the end, and Portnoy as always is doing a bunch of stuff that makes no sense to me whatsoever, but sounds badass. Pretty decent lyrics in this one, which is rare for a DT song in my opinion.




5) "The Glass Prison" - Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence

Portnoy's first installment in the "Twelve-Step Suite", a sweeping four song epic about his bout with alcoholism sets the stage for the remaining three songs. Some of the best heavy stuff that DT does, hands down. You can head bang to this one! Parts of it are actually in 4/4 time!




4) "The Mirror" - Awake

Switching between time signatures is no joke, but Portnoy and the gang do it so flawlessly you'll swear they aren't doing anything at all. It's kind of a precursor to the "Twelve-Step Suite", as it also deals with Portnoy's alcoholism, but their aren't any real thematic ties to it. This song is heavy, my friend.




3) "Surrounded" - Images and Words

Songs about Ivory Towers are awesome.










2) "Learning to Live" - Images and Words

Here's the other song where LaBrie hits that F#5. Listen to it and you'll know why he only does this every ten years.








1) "The Entire Fucking Album" - Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes From a Memory

The whole thing is a time-travelling, mind-switching, psychic murder mystery. Do I really need to tell you how awesome this fucking thing is! It's an album with a goddamn twist ending!

Remembrance.

I miss this show. I loved this show. I needed this show. Whatever happened to cool kids gameshows like this one. I mean, geez, the part at the end where they have to go all through the temple was genuinely intense. You never knew when those creepy temple guards were gonna pop out and grab you. It didn't matter how many Pendants of Life you had, those fucking guards would scare the shit out you anyway.

Also, whatever happened to parting gifts on game shows? Not just kids shows either. I mean, full on game shows like Wheel of Fortune and stuff. Remember? "Oh, that's too bad, but we have some lovely parting gifts for you." Nowadays, people don't get shit - just the shame of losing a game show in front of a bunch of strangers that think they can do better.

These Days are Getting Pretty Short.

It sucks waking up at 3 in the afternoon, seeing as I have to somehow make myself tired in order to go to sleep at 3 in the morning.

Most of my days are spent waiting for this game to come out. Hopefully it will be just as awesome as the first one, to say nothing of it being better. I like the idea of a trilogy of games where actions have consequences that carry over from game to game. I don't see how they can do it, since some of the endings in the first Mass Effect were so different, they would create almost entirely different and divergent universes for the second game, but if anyone can do it, it's Bioware.

One of the greatest discoveries of my life came to me when I found out that one of my now-and-then friends is an employee of Bioware. Not only that, but that he is a lead combat designer for The Old Republic - a game that just might make me invest in a serious PC.

Thanks again, dear readers. I can say "readerS" now, since I now have 2 - count 'em - 2 followers.

"As a Species, We're Fundamentally Insane."

I like being cold, because I like to be warm. Weird.

Before I go to bed, I'm going to leave you (me) with one thought. Everything we do is inherently selfish. In other words, every action you or I will ever take is taken because it is viewed to be in our own self interest.

I Like Life-Affirming Things.

I picked up an affinity for all things life-affirming and optimistic from an old roommate of mine, who showed me the importance of optimism and otherwise positive brain input. So when I see things like this on TV, I can't help but smile.

The Biggest Loser may not be the best show on TV, in fact, most of the time I despise reality show schlock, but at least it's a show where everybody wins. Even if these people don't win the grand prize of $250,000, they still got their lives back, and they're much healthier for it. That's a life-affirming show.

This is something I really believe in, in theory more than in practice. I wish I could be a life-affirming person. Someone who others look at and say, "hey, it makes me feel better about the world just knowing he's in it." That quality is rare in a person, but I feel like I've done a pretty good job of surrounding myself with those types of people. People who don't say negative things, even when joking around. I like the feeling that brings to me. Despite the fact that maybe I don't reciprocate.

A few friends and myself have been casually developing an idea for a prehistoric metal band, and I'm starting to think it might be the most awesome thing I've ever heard of. We might call the genre "Tricerapop" or perhaps "Proglodyte", but that's getting way ahead of things, first we have to write the "Stegachoruses".

Picture, if you will, metal songs about a war between Dinosaurs and Cavemen, where thousands of cavemen are being thrown into volcanoes by Pteranadons. Sounds pretty damn kick-ass to me. The saga could end with man's dwindling numbers finally defeating the Thunder Lizards by retreating into the safety of their caves as thousands of meteors lay their foes to waste. It practically writes itself.

And I'll end my post with this:


Can't be long now.

Status Report!

Take THAT Niagra Falls!!!

One of the benefits of having a cheap apartment is the amazing water pressure. At times, I find that I have to wear plate mail to take a shower. Otherwise, all my skin will be ripped from my skeleton in a raging torrent of water. Seriously, though, my water pressure blows.

Today, I Feel Like This:

Christmas time is my favorite time of year, mostly because I get a lot of money and presents. I think I calculated that I made about $30/hr at work today, which means it's going to be a good month.

I find it odd that the one night of the week that I don't drink is always the night before I wake up late to work. Logic tells me that there's a probable connection, but not necessarily. I guess I'll just have to drink before important things: work, holidays, funerals, and family dinners.

It's Late.

I've been working on this picture for what feels a lot like a month now. I think it might actually have only been a week or two, but my concept of time is all screwed up anyhow.

This still has a long way to go, but I figured it was good enough to show to people.
I'm tentatively calling it "Lights Out" because I'm a really hilarious guy.

Anyway, for those of you that don't know, my friend Jeff invented a bunch of comic book characters and he lets me draw them. This particular hero is one of the main characters (in my opinion, he's THE main character). Jeff is real coy about telling me everything about him, and I don't want to ruin any of his surprises down the line, but I can tell you that his name is Aristagoras, and he's a superhero living in Dagger City. He doesn't have any particularly superhuman powers, but he is a master street brawler, and I guess he's a little tougher than normal people, but certainly not invincible.


This is my makeshift easel that I'm actually pretty proud of. I'm a poor man, so real easels are out, drawers and cabinets are in. It can be a little flimsy, but it's nice to finally be able to draw at eye level.